Exhausted from Looking Around

Lately I've been tired. 

I've been sick off and on for the last few months as my immune system has been down and I can't seem to get healthy long enough to get much strength back. Over the last few weeks I've been recovering from leptospirosis, a difficult disease to pinpoint so it took a while to be diagnosed and the recovery has been slow. I would greatly appreciate your prayers as I continue to regain my strength and hopefully stay healthy for a while. I will say that my health is definitely one of the things I take for granted on a regular basis. 

I've been tired with sin. Do you ever get discouraged when you look around? I sit and listen to stories of my friend's husband being beaten and left for dead because he's a Karamojong working in a Busoga region. I am bewildered when I get a call that our friend's baby, who was healthy in the morning, just died by the evening of unknown causes. I am at a loss when I hear of news around the world. I'm exhausted when by the weight of my own sin and the daily struggle to take off the old and put on the new. 

I'm just tired.

Do you ever feel like that? The darkness is so real and evil is so present. I can't seem to get my chin above water -- physically, spiritually, emotionally. 

And then comes Easter.

HOPE. The historical event when Christ paid the price for my sins and still forgives. He still forgives. The light that He has brought into the world that death could not contain. The light that shines in the darkness, in this dark world. The event when He took on the sins of this broken world and redeemed us to be His own, so that this world would not be our home. 

The words of an old hymn have wrung in my head today. "I Look Not Back" tells the story of how we could look back, forward, outward, and inward and see sin, corruption, evil, and confusion. However, when we look to Him, we find hope. 

The last verse reads, "But I look up -- into the face of Jesus. For there my heart can rest; my fears are stilled. And there is joy, and love, and light for darkness. And perfect peace, and every hope fulfilled." 

Where are you looking today? I know I tend to look inward, outward, forward, or backward. I encourage you, as I do myself this day, to look to Him. May the hope that we find in the Resurrection not just be celebrated with nice clothes and Easter eggs, but daily as we know His grace. 

"Looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God" (Hebrews 12:2) 

Our redemption was His joy. He is our joy. There is joy for us there as well! My prayer is that you would fix your eyes on Him so His joy, love, and light would shine brightly in your life. Would you pray that over me as well?

Our Christmas celebration!

This sweet girl turned one!

Oh, and I got engaged. :)