His Strength for Obedience

My boda home today was a wet one!

As I rode home on my boda today in the rain, I thought of the song "This is My Word" and the words that come out of Isaiah 55. I thought of the crops that needed the rain. I thought of the people who need the crops for food. I thanked God for His faithfulness even in providing rain for the food that will feed this land.

I thought of the promise that His Word does not go forth and return void. I clung to that promise. I remembered that His Word is living and active. I remembered that He alone can save.

The view off of my balcony of the sunset

As I look around, I see injustice and hardened hearts. My heart breaks. However, when I look into the Old Testament, I see that real men and women were faced with the same things. God called them to preach repentance to His people, and they obeyed.

The strange thing is, there were those who were promised that they would not see the fruit that came from their obedience. Isaiah asked in chapter 6 how long he would have to call the men and women to repentance, and God said, "until cities lie waste without inhabitant, and houses without people, and the land is a desolate waste." So basically, he wouldn't see any repentance at all. Then there's Jeremiah and Amos and so many others. Men who sought the Lord and His glory and were obedient, but who did not come home with a outstanding missionary report. They were obedient, even when promised that the outcome would not be what they desired. 

I've thought of that lately as hearts are hard and even the thought of preaching the law as it's necessary seems futile. I've thought of how depressing that would have been for Isaiah and Jeremiah. They were real men, after all. I wonder if they ever questioned God's plan. Maybe a "Really God? Can't we renegotiate Your plan here? Do I really have to keep going to these hardened people?" I'm sure they genuinely cared about these people -- you see that as they plead for mercy that God would spare them His wrath -- but there had to be days of discouragement. However, they were obedient. 

One of my best friend's daughter

These men and women would have crumbled in their own strength. They would have hit a wall, broke down, and gone back to "America". However, they did not serve out of obedience that flowed from their own strength. Nehemiah said, "the joy of the Lord is your strength". Those words have never meant so much to me. Joy -- unlike happiness -- cannot be taken away and is not circumstantial. They were obedient because of the joy set before them, just as Jesus did as stated in Hebrews 12:2.

I have seen fruit of the Gospel in Masese. I have friends who -- praise the LORD! -- have been called into His righteousness. I have seen His light in that dark community. But honestly, so many days of the last few months have been lined with discouragement. I doubt that repentance will be found, so I don't bother to speak at all. I deny the power of His Word by keeping silent. I crumble as I rely in my own strength.

I have not been into the community for some time now as we've been dealing with some hard issues. Without going into detail, it has become unsafe for myself as well as those who I visit to be there at the moment. Would you pray that God would grant wisdom to see His timing in this? We don't want to cause those whom we love grief in their community by our visits, but we also do not wish to be lead by fear and allow Satan to drive us out.

With the help of Rhoda, my first turkey!

In this time of confusion, discouragement, and a lack of direction as to where to go from here, I've been quiet. Other missionaries in the community who are a part of the church body here have also been still. We feel the need for prayer more than ever right now, and have committed to praying together twice a week. There are times when I feel like I should be there, I should be doing something. But how sweet it is to labor for this community in prayer! We've stood in awe of God together, we've confessed our sins and personal agendas before Him, and we've prayed for hearts to be softened. We pray that men and women would be raised within Masese to reach their own tribes. We pray that Satan would lose his stronghold in this dark community and God would send His angels to protect and wage war against the evil forces at work. We pray for those whom we love and for those who very much do not like us at the moment. We pray for wisdom and patience and hearts that would love as He loves.

So today, I don't have great stories to share. I don't have have much except to point to God's grace in the midst of this. We see His hand over us and His goodness in allowing us to see truth that has been denied to bring about so much injustice. We see His desire for us to spend time with Him and serve Masese in a real, tangible way through prayer. While this may seem like a rough season with more questions than answers, I'm thankful.

"I sought the Lord, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears." -- Psalm 34:4

May we serve Him in the spirit of love, as He has not given us a spirit of fear. May we serve in His strength and the joy of our salvation! Tonight I'm thankful that His joy is my strength.